Between booking the flights, reserving hotels, exploring activities, preplanning for the actual travel can get lost. And that can lead to a rough beginning for fun family time. As families head out, a few tips can make the going easier.

“Are we there yet?” Let’s face it—sitting strapped in a seat, whether on a plane or in a car, is tough for all of us. So, it’s no wonder children are anxious to get the traveling over. Rather than hoping to get lost in your own book as you travel, plan activities to pass the time for your children. You won’t be as frustrated by having to put the book down, and planning activities to fill the time is a lifesaver. (If you have older children, assign each a period to entertain their younger siblings so you can squeeze in a little reading time for yourself.)

For infants, whose attention span is about five minutes, you’ll want between ten and twelve different toys to provide a constantly changing repertoire. Keys, light-up phones, small picture books, a soft animal all provide different stimuli to help you keep her interest.

At least most infants will sleep; toddlers are tougher — big enough to run around but too young to understand they can’t. Again, have a variety of stimuli—toys, audio books, and snacks. One friend buys several cheap toys (i.e. at Dollar Tree) and wraps them in gift paper. The excitement of opening something new keeps toddler’s attention. She holds the stash back to use when a fussy period can’t be stopped by the usual methods or uses them as rewards for not whining.

The best tip for older children is to let them know how long they will be traveling so they can prepare themselves and pack their own favorite time fillers—books, music, playing cards, and travel/video games. Even older children may need incentives to avoid complaining. One method is to fill a jar with coins. For every complaint — a coin is removed. Promise children that any money left in the jar at the end of the trip is theirs to split. This offers both a carrot for compliance and puts pressure on them to work as a team rather than irritating each other.

One note — videos can be a great way to break up a particularly long car trip, but should be used sporadically. The more they’re offered, the less effective they are at holding attention. Further, children are twice as likely to misbehave after an abundance of video feed. Ration the time and you’ll more likely enjoy children’s behavior once you arrive.

“I want my blanket!” Don’t forget the comfort objects. All too often I have carefully packed the security blanket or favorite bear safely in the baggage to ensure its presence in a strange hotel only to overlook its importance on the trip out. Travel is both monotonous and stressful for little ones — great times to have a comfort object. Plus, though dad may need the air conditioner on high, smaller children get cold. A blanket helps create harmony.

“Let’s run a little.” If you are traveling by car and can manage to pack a cooler with a meal (or buy sandwiches from a convenience store), rest stops provide a great opportunity to use pent up energy. Children (and parents) can stretch legs by running around. Some fresh air and relaxed sitting is a great antidote for travel fever. It’s quick — no fast food lines or waiting for waitresses and right off the highway. Parents, who have been containing children in a car, don’t have to contain them at a restaurant table. Finally, the food you pack, which still should have some fun, is generally healthier than restaurant fare which also leads to better behavior. A little break--a little food and you’re ready to hit the road with renewed energy.

“What did I do wrong?” If you are flying, taking a tour bus, or traveling by train spell out expectations before you board. Remind children to confine themselves to their seat rather than invading the seat of the stranger beside them with toys or elbows. Also, explain they may need to stop talking to the nice lady beside them if she gets tired. Detail the process of getting through security, boarding, the noises of takeoff, and other specifics that may frighten or confuse. Give a procedure they should follow should you get separated. Being clear about expectations before-hand can eliminate most problems before they arise.

Family vacations are supposed to be fun. Don’t let a rough start spoil all your planning. A little preparation for the trip out can be the beginning of a beautiful time together.

Tess Worrell is the mother of eight and teaches parenting and marriage. E-mail her at YourFamilyMatterstous.com.